Am I Funny? A Year of Stand Up and What I’ve Learned
It’s been a year since I first started doing stand-up comedy again; a year and three weeks actually but who’s counting? I wrote about my journey at the six month mark back in November. The first year has been filled with highs and lows, much like any creative outlet that one pursues.
During that time, I’ve done over 40 open mics and got to be the emcee for open mics twice at two different clubs. I’ve participated in two comedy competitions, advancing to the second round in both; my third competition starts next month. I’ve done over ten showcases, and was paid a little for some of them. I’ve hosted two weekend shows and got to open for Fortune Feimster. Oh, and I also started a musical comedy duo and have done shows and open mics with that. That’s a lot for one year, more than I could have imagined, and I’m quite proud of everything I’ve accomplished in such a short time.
So what have I learned?
Why am I doing this? I’ve frequently had to stop and remind myself why I’m doing this. First and foremost, as I said, it’s a creative outlet for me. I’ve been a painter. I’ve been an actor. I’ve been a poet. I’ve been an author. Those are all creative titles I’ve embraced at one time or another, and now I can add comedian to that list. It satisfies a creative part of me and I enjoy making people laugh.
I should have stuck with it. It’s fun to stop and think about “what might be” or “what could have been” had I stuck with this when I first started all those years ago. It’s also easy to beat myself up over not sticking with it. Too many times I think artists and creatives focus too much on the bigger picture and they end up losing site of what’s right in front of them, the here and now. I’m guilty of doing that a lot. I can’t go back and change my decisions that I made way back when no matter how much I wish I could. All I can do is make better decisions now. It’s kind of like all those people who think they have a great idea for a book. It’s just an idea until you actually sit down and start writing it, and writing a book from start to finish is tougher than you think.
It’s okay to fail. This is something else I have to remind myself over and over again. Just last week I had two rotten open mics, the kind that make me go back and question again why I’m doing this! But we can’t always be perfect. And with comedy, you have to accept that sometimes circumstances are out of your control. The crowd is small. Sometimes they just don’t relate to you. Maybe they are having a good time but just not laughing out loud. Or maybe it’s just a room full of comics who’ve heard your jokes over and over again already. Or maybe you have to go first and the crowd isn’t warmed up. It’s not always your fault.
You have to be on! I learned this lesson quite recently at a horrible open mic where there were only 4 people in the crowd who weren’t comics. I convinced myself I was going to have a rotten set and I did. I let the size of the crowd and lack of laughter cause me to give up. In other words, I wasted an opportunity because I set myself up for failure. I watched another comic go up after me and do the exact opposite. He didn’t get laughs either, but he was “on” and he had a good set. He probably didn’t think so but it was still good practice. He didn’t waste a mic!
Other people are going to be better than me. I don’t care so much about this now as I probably would have years ago when starting out, but it’s true. Others will always be funnier or more talented or get farther at this than I will. I see young comics who have that spark and that drive, and I want to give them the advice that I wish someone might have given me all those years ago: Don’t hold back! Don’t be afraid of failure! Go live the dream and find a spot for yourself and be famous! I doubt I would have listened but it goes back to “what might have been” had I only jumped in my car and driven to Chicago or New York or California and went for it!
I’m still learning. And what’s more important is that I’m still enjoying this. Too many times I’ve abandoned a passion or a creative outlet for some unknown reason. And I’m also writing, which has always been a long-term passion of mine. I may not be pounding out a novel like I wish, but I’m jotting ideas and notes in my joke journal and I know eventually they’ll become something. And I’m okay with that.
So I’m a comedian, or at least learning to be one. It’s easy to adopt the title of comedian. You go to your first open mic and you get introduced as “our next comedian coming to the stage is…” You got the title and you didn’t even earn it. But no one knows but you. And I’m okay with that too.